Every couple wants to have a happy and healthy relationship. But maintaining a strong connection with your partner takes more than just love and affection. One important factor that can make or break a relationship is something called love maps. Love maps are mental maps that couples have about each other's interests, values, and life experiences. Knowing your partner's love maps is the key to building a deep and meaningful connection with them. In this blog post, we will be discussing how to increase love maps using the seven principles for making marriage work by John Gottman.

Ask Open-Ended Questions

One of the best ways to increase love maps is by asking open-ended questions about your partner's life experiences. It's important to ask questions that are not just about facts, but also about emotions and feelings. This will help you understand your partner better and deepen your connection. Examples of questions you can ask are "What is your favorite childhood memory?" or "What are some of your biggest fears or hopes?"

Be a Good Listener

When your partner is sharing something with you, make sure that you are fully present and paying attention. This means putting away your phone, turning off the TV, and maintaining eye contact. It's important to show genuine interest in what your partner is saying, even if you might not agree. By being a good listener, you will be able to understand your partner's perspective and strengthen your love maps.

Share Your Own Experiences

While it's important to learn about your partner's life experiences, it's also important to share your own. Sharing your own stories will help your partner better understand your values, interests, and personality. This will allow you both to feel more connected and increase your love maps. Make sure to take turns sharing, and listen actively when your partner is sharing their experiences.

Practice Empathy

Empathy means understanding and sharing your partner's feelings. When your partner is going through a difficult time, it's important to put yourself in their shoes and support them. This will help strengthen your love maps and deepen your connection. It's important to validate your partner's feelings and let them know that you are there for them no matter what.

Spend Quality Time Together

Finally, spending quality time together is important for increasing love maps. This means doing activities that you both enjoy, whether it's watching a movie, going for a walk, or cooking together. It's important to make time for each other and prioritize your relationship. When you spend quality time together, you are creating new memories and deepening your connection.

Conclusion

In conclusion, increasing love maps is an essential part of building a strong and healthy relationship. By using the seven principles for making marriage work by John Gottman, you can deepen your connection with your partner and increase your love maps. Remember to ask open-ended questions, be a good listener, share your own experiences, practice empathy, and spend quality time together. By doing these things, you can create a deep and meaningful connection with your partner that will last a lifetime.